Category: Depression and Suicide

Essays about depression and suicide.

Out of the Darkness

My name is Kephen Merancis and there’s really no easy way to start the conversation that we need to have. It takes a lot of courage to break the wall of silence that stigma builds. It takes at least a little bit of hope…

U.S. Behavioral Health and the Workplace

According to the American Psychiatric Association Foundation, employees with depression miss on average 31.4 days per year and an additional 27.9 days of unproductivity when they report for work, but are unable to focus due to the symptoms of depression. Various studies show that…

Choose To Live

Choose To Live Do something that scares you. Go places you’ve never been before. Become the person you wish other people would be. Ever since my mom died almost two years ago, I have constantly faced the mortality of my own existence. Too many…

Alone In The Dark

An Educational Report by Kephen Merancis Introduction This report is intended to educate the public on the risk of suicide in those under the age of fifteen. It is my hope and my intention that through education and awareness, we can stem the rise…

His Empty Soul

    His Empty Soul: How to Heal a Broken Man   There are only a few things every man needs in his life to feel as though he’s living the most fulfilled life that he can. The first critical thing every man needs…

The Choice That Never Was

  The Choice That Never Was I wanted to believe that my work of writing about this topic had since passed and that I would never again have to write in defense of it, of us, of the nature of our being.  Unfortunately we…

​Abortion, Abstinence, Abuse, Birth Control, Teen Sex, and Unwanted Pregnancy

Abortion, Abstinence, Abuse, Birth Control, Teen Sex, and Unwanted Pregnancy One in every five American teens lives in poverty.  Abuse, poverty and a lack of opportunity plays an important role in not only teen pregnancy, but also unwanted pregnancies in general.  Later in this…

Everywhere You Go, There You Are

Everywhere You Go, There You Are A decade ago my mind was in a very dark place.  In this darkness I looked for the light, even the tiniest little bit of hope that my suffering had an ending and perhaps a meaning. I sought…

Words To Live By

Words To Live By I’m sharing this video because as a 4 minute reflection, it may very well be the most profound thing you listen to this month, for the next six months, or perhaps even this whole year. In fact, if you’re like…

In Search of Self

In Search of Self Over the years I’ve learned that the most potent of personal feelings can be the most consoling and relatable to other people who are going through their own hardships. So without even knowing it, you can touch the lives of…

It’s Been A While

It’s Been A While August 19, 2016 I haven’t posted anything on here in quite some time.  Furthermore, I haven’t typed anything extensive that would garner being posted.  The year 2016 has been a harsh one, not just for me, but also for other…

The Darklord

I feel it now, in the distance, that slow advance of the cold, pressing forwards and retreating as if to test the walls of my castle.  It comes at dawn and dusk, settles upon me in an eerie breath of darkness the way the…

In My Own Words

**Note: this essay was written in 2012, I no longer identify under the label “gay”.  The word has too many restrictions, connotations, stereotypes and unintended meanings. July 2, 2012 In My Own Words It is fundamentally important to understand that people choose their religious…

Here and There, Now and Then

January 29, 2012 It’s no secret that I’m unhappy with my life. Clearly, I need to do something about that. What isn’t so obvious to me, is what I need to do. I’m unhappy with my personal life and I’m unhappy with my professional…

Self-Reflection: To End A Cold, Damp Day

September 18, 2011 Self-Reflection: To End A Cold, Damp Day If ever there was something that I could call my own, something that I could say was my niche in life, this would be it. What I’m doing right now, this act is the…

Two Journeys, One Life

March 27, 2011 I was born on the 14th of November 1985 to Catholic German Americans. On one August night in the year 1996, a black hand would descend upon me, leaving behind a scar that would forever alter the direction of my life….

The Demon In Me

January 2, 2011 The Demon In Me Everything is black, save the sparks of sanity within; the buzz in my head, a melody of self-deprivation or rather the hum of degradation.  I look around and the darkness prevails, always the melancholy thought, but dammit I…

Through My Eyes

November 29, 2010 “Because everywhere I go there is a world that doesn’t understand.” I would give up the rest of my life to show you how it feels, to make you see life through my eyes. If even for a moment, I could…

A Letter on the Intrinsic Threads of the Human Heart

October 2, 2010 Dear Whomever, For half a decade I have been sharing my deepest and often times my darkest thoughts with anyone who has wandered onto my path. I have shared my life, my private thoughts and my most personal of emotions in…

These Walls, That Shadow, Those Memories and This Soul

September 10, 2010 These Walls, that Shadow, those Memories, and this Soul How do you heal a man who’s pain is inside his head, a pain that transcends flesh and bone? Behind these walls of distrust and shame, hidden so far deep inside of…

Meditation

An Outline of a Course in the Art of Meditation: The Awareness of Thought An Introduction I once told myself how rediculous meditation must be. I thought that to be void of thought was perhaps the most terrible state in which to exist. To…

Depression and Iron: A Love Story

February 28, 2010 Many years ago I picked up a barbell for the first time after watching my brothers do the same. It only weighed between 10 and 20 lbs, but this one instance would lead to many more for years to come and…

Asylum of My Mind: A Beckoning to Darker Places

November 30, 2009 Asylum of My Mind: A Beckoning to Darker Places A subtle flickering of light in my head, a missed revelation to coming events. For a moment I think to myself that it’s nothing at all, just something for today. It won’t…

My Heart in the Sun

August 2008 My Heart in the Sun So long ago a journey to forget all the things that I had remembered, began with the kiss of poison in a cup.  Embarked upon in the name of hope and peace, like banners in the sky,…

The Sun Will Rise Again

November 2007 The Sun Will Rise Again Reading about or hearing the stories of people who are or who once fought with depression makes me remember my own dark days. Looking back now, it’s hard to believe that I was once that far down,…